I just bought my husband a grill that costs around $500, for his birthday. Initially he was very happy about it, because itís basically going to be the first part of our patio renovation. But now that he knows how much it was, he wants to take it back. I donít understand why. I took the time out of my day, went to (a hardware store) with the three kids in tow, bought the thing, drove it home and unloaded it by myself. I donít know what the issue is. I feel as though itís not appreciated. He says that we should have discussed such a hefty amount of money being spent on a grill before I bought it. But if we had discussed it, then it wouldnít have been a surprise present for him. Heís being difficult and wonít listen to me at all. What do I do?

Gifty Wife

Dear Gifty,

The present wasnít really a present because the money ultimately came out of the joint account, money that could have been used for the kids, the house, bills or the backyard renovation you spoke of. In my opinion, $500 for a grill is kind of a lot; I hope it cooks and turns the steaks by itself!

Have you guys discussed a new grill before? Have you guys looked at grills in stores and had him tell you what he likes in a grill and what he doesnít like? Or was this a gift that you just thought of and bought without researching? If itís the latter, he may be shocked by the purchase because itís not what he wanted. Maybe he wanted an $85 charcoal grill from the discount store. I mean, if my husband bought me a $500 necklace and didnít research the type of gems I liked or the color gold, Iíd be pretty disappointed as well. The gesture was there, but I would have been disappointed.

This may be true for your husband. He appreciates the gesture, but he knows that the money could have been spent on something better for the patio or whatever.

If you have discussed grills in the past and you did your research, maybe he feels bad because you bought it for him. You know how men have a lot of pride, and they make the money, and blah, blah, blah. Maybe heís embarrassed that his wife bought the dream grill that he couldnít afford or muster up the courage to buy. My suggestion is to talk it out. Figure out exactly why he wants to take it back. Does he want to exchange it or does he want the money for something else. Talk it through. Good luck.

(Editorís note: Sharilyn Wells really doesnít know much about anything, but sheíll definitely share her opinion with you whenever needed. To get a Ďstraight upí opinion to your countless issues, email paraglidebragg@gmail.com)